One of my favorite ways to relax is to do a progressive muscle relaxation. To do a progressive muscle relaxation, you go through each body part, tense it, and then feel the difference as you relax it. So I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how to teach kids how to do a progressive muscle relaxation. Here are my thoughts.
Welcome to Little Elf Family Services! I’m Lara Elfstrand. I am a parent coach, and I am here to help parents to feel connected, rested, and thriving. I have a master’s degree in early childhood special education (and a clear teaching credential), and I am endorsed as an infant family advanced transdisciplinary mental health practitioner.
I became a parent in 2007, and it changed me and my life completely. I realized just how much a person changes when they become a parent. It changed my values, my priorities, and my marriage! The things I learned cannot be summarized in one blog post or even in one blog. But here are just a few things that I would start with:
Nesting parties ask us to re-think the way that we celebrate new parents and challenge us to focus on what the expecting parents need. It’s really less of a party and more of an opportunity to provide the family help.
Unlike baby showers, “Nesting parties shift the focus from stuff to support to help families prepare their homes and hearts for life with a new baby,” explains Lara Elfstrand, the pediatric sleep practitioner of Little Elf Family Services.
Sleep Support and Parent Coaching with Little Elf Family Services
Colorado Springs, CO June 1, 2026 —
Colorado Springs welcomes child sleep expert, Lara Elfstrand “The Sleep Elf,” to the community. All professionals working with families of young children know that infant and child sleep is crucial for proper development of the child and health and happiness of the parents.
Since I recently wrote a post on Miralax and constipation, I am looking at ways to support iron absorption in kiddos with constipation. One of the best ways to do this is to incorporate more organ meats into our diets (sorry, vegetarians! I’ll have to create another post later to brainstorm that on another day). And even I (a generally not too picky eater) don’t like organ meats. But I like the idea that by eating nose-to-tail, “It’s a valuable way to honor the animal that gave its life for your nourishment.” So I am doing some research today to see what recipes I can find to make them more palatable (Click on each line to see where it came from):
When I work with families on sleep, I am always asking about poop! We all sleep better when poop is not too loose but not too hard either. MANY of the kids that I work with experience issues with their poop. Many children come to me taking Miralax every day. When that happens, I want to brainstorm together what we can do to support better poop and to brainstorm with your child’s doctor a) to figure out where the constipation might be coming from, and b) to find more natural ways to relieve constipation. Like many of my strategies, the goal is to use Miralax as much as necessary but as little as possible—to reduce Miralax if possible, but also making sure that we use it enough to sufficiently reduce constipation symptoms.
What’s the difference between nightmares and night terrors?
Nightmares are bad dreams that wake us from sleep and often make it difficult to go back to sleep. Sleep terrors, sometimes called night terrors, “is a sleep disorder that occurs when a person sits up in bed with a loud scream or cry and a look of intense fear… The person tends to be unresponsive and will be confused and disoriented if awakened. Attempts to console the person may prolong or intensify the episode…” (American Academy of Sleep Medicine Parasomnia Factsheet).
Many of the children that I serve seem like they are not getting enough total hours of sleep in a day for their age. And while I certainly understand that different children MAY have different sleep needs, I also think it’s worth giving kids the OPPORTUNITY to get more sleep and see how their body responds. Here are two methods (from Elizabeth Pantley’s No-Cry Sleep Solutions for Babies through Preschoolers) for finding your child’s ideal bedtime.
In this 10 minute video, I share some of the impacts that teaching the Gottman Bringing Baby Home program (which is the basis for the upcoming Still Us Valentine’s Retreat) has had on our family. Our family has experienced reduced friction, tension, and arguing through rituals of connection, such as:
Morning dances
A 2-person journal
Family meetings
You’ve heard it before: put your oxygen mask on first.
It can sound trite… until you’re the one running on empty.
The oxygen mask metaphor exists for a reason.
When parents’ needs are ignored, everything feels harder. When parents are supported, life feels more breathable. This retreat is designed to help you feel seen, cared for, and resourced so you can return home steadier and more connected. Come experience what it’s like when your needs are part of the plan.
Ten years into teaching the Gottman Bringing Baby Home® program, and this part still amazes me.
The couples who practice these skills don’t just communicate better. They build routines that make their homes feel warmer, calmer, and more supportive. Not perfect. Not rigid. Just steady enough to hold real life.
When the world feels loud, heavy, and overwhelming, I remind myself of this:
The work that matters most is often small, slow, and close to home.
Raising children who know how to pause, repair, take turns, express needs, and stay curious is not separate from creating a more just and humane world. It’s part of it.
This 2025 client wins video highlights real progress families made this year. Small steps, big shifts, and moments worth celebrating. “Celebration” was one of my words of the year this past year, and this post is about pausing to acknowledge what worked for families and how hard my families have worked. These are families with children of ALL abilities. Let’s celebrate our wins!
Sometimes, the smallest moments—a deep breath, a hand on a forehead, a quiet pause—can create the biggest shifts. A mom I recently worked with had one of those moments, and with her permission, I want to share the story with you.
When we first met, this sweet boy spent the entire hour crying and screaming and whining, and sounding generally extremely overtired.
A lovey—sometimes called a comfort object—is more than just a cute stuffed animal or soft blanket. It’s a bridge between your child’s need for comfort and their growing ability to self-soothe. When introduced thoughtfully, a lovey can help your baby or toddler feel calm, connected, and ready for sleep.
Here’s how to make that introduction with care and intention.
Daylight Savings Time. Ugh, it is a struggle sometimes. I’ve been noticing that my body is struggling to sleep until my intended wake time. My Oura Ring has helped me figure out that my body does best when I sleep from 10:30 PM to 6:30 AM. Before the time change, I was often waking up between 5:30 and 6 AM and then doing a 30 minute hypnosis or two so that I could still get good rest (and heal my nervous system) until it was time to get up.
I am a learner. And what that means to me is that I am always in the process of growing, making mistakes, learning from them, and growing some more.
One of the ways that I support myself in that is that I love to have jewelry that reminds me of what I’m working on. Lately I’ve been making rings. Right now I have a ring that says “My needs matter” and another one that says “It’s safe to go slow.” I have another one arriving
If you’ve been following me for a while, you know that we have adopted a rescue dog, Charlie, who often has had anxious behaviors. For a long time now, I’ve been wanting to write a blog post about what one of our dog trainers called “the Mr. Rogers hack.” She suggested that we talk to Charlie about scary things by using simple language to talk honestly about what is happening, imitating the style of Mr. Rogers.
I feel like this is one of the first times that I could actually see the results of exercise on my glucose IN REAL TIME. The Glucose Goddess says that saying we don’t have to pay attention to our glucose because we don’t have diabetes is like saying we don’t have to brush our teeth because we don’t have cavities.
Well, for me the cookies at Harris Ranch Resort are like cryptonite.
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©Lara Elfstrand, MA ECSE, IF-ATMHP, CPSI - Little Elf Family Services, 101 S. Santa Fe Ave. #188, Fountain, CO 80817
