connected, guts, rested, sleep, thriving
Lara Elfstrand
Tense, Release, Repeat: A Playful Guide to ...

Progressive muscle relaxation isn’t just for adults—it can be a playful and powerful way to help kids manage stress, too. By turning relaxation into games—like blowing bubbles with slow breaths, dancing like stiff robots and floppy noodles, or squeezing toes in the mud—we can teach children how to notice the difference between tension and calm. The best part? When parents join in, kids don’t just learn the skill—they feel the calm spread through the whole family.

Tense, Release, Repeat: A Playful Guide to Kids’ Relaxation
connected, rested, thriving
Lara Elfstrand
Welcome to Little Elf Family Services!
Welcome to Little Elf Family Services!
guts, rested, sleep, thriving
Lara Elfstrand
Why What You Eat Could Be Waking You Up at Night

The Sleep-Food Connection

Today I am reflecting on the relationship between healthy eating and sleep.  This morning, I was listening to the audiobook “The Sleep Prescription” by Aric A. Prather, Ph.D.  I’ve been slowly working through his sleep “class” in HeadSpace and decided to listen to his audiobook as I work to improve sleep both for myself and for my clients.  I’m just on day 2 at the moment, but this quote really struck me.

“Carb lovers, pay attention here: carbs are an interesting case. Studies have unearthed that while most carbohydrates will actually help you fall asleep faster, only certain types will help you stay asleep. Simple and sugary carbs (think pizza, white bread, bagels, pasta) can cause more wake ups throughout the night. In contrast, complex carbs (again, these are the more high-fiber foods like sweet potatoes, oatmeal, and whole grains) can stabilize your sleep patterns—possibly, Dr. St-Onge theorizes, because they also stabilize your blood sugar.[11]” Excerpt From The Sleep Prescription by Aric A. Prather, PhD  https://books.apple.com/book/id1608147733 This material may be protected by copyright.

My Own Sleep & Glucose Journey

Lately I have discovered that my waking glucose levels are consistently in the pre-diabetic range.  I have been using the Stelo non-prescription continuous glucose monitor and reading books like Good Energy by Dr. Casey Means and The Glucose Revolution by Jessie Inchaupé.   And my sister-in-law gave me an extra Oura ring, which connects with the Stelo to give insights between glucose and other biomarkers! (Such an amazing gift… although I warn that there is an ongoing fee to use the Oura ring in addition to the up-front cost of the ring itself but also I think it’s totally worth it!).

Why What You Eat Could Be Waking You Up at Night
rested, connected, thriving, reflection
Lara Elfstrand
The Real Reason I Do This Business (Hint: It’s ...

The real reason I have my own business. Hint: It’s about you AND me.

The Real Reason I Do This Business (Hint: It’s About You and Me)
baby, pregnancy
Lara Elfstrand
What is a Nesting Party? How to Host and How to ...

Nesting parties ask us to re-think the way that we celebrate new parents and challenge us to focus on what the expecting parents need. It’s really less of a party and more of an opportunity to provide the family help.

Unlike baby showers, “Nesting parties shift the focus from stuff to support to help families prepare their homes and hearts for life with a new baby,” explains Lara Elfstrand, the pediatric sleep practitioner of Little Elf Family Services. 

What is a Nesting Party? How to Host and How to Show Up

celebration

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And the award goes to...: Why We Deserve the (Dog) Parents of the Year Award (and You Might Too)

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And the award goes to...: Why We Deserve the (Dog) Parents of the Year Award (and You Might Too)

These last few weeks have been tough. I’ve gotten TOO MUCH ADVICE from people who meant well, but my body interpreted it as criticism and shame. It’s been impacting my mental health and my sleep. And then my neighbors had a party and I sat on the porch swing and cried because having company over has been too much for Charlie and I so LONG to have friends and family members over.

And I know that when I get anxious, Charlie gets MORE anxious. When I cry, he hides behind the couch. Ouch. This is only making things worse.

So what have I done since then?

  • I have watched my nutrition, focusing on eating more whole foods and less processed foods.

  • I have protected my sleep schedule, using a lot of HeadSpace sleepcasts, letting my body know that I will do my best to listen to my body during the daytime and using sleep casts to at least get some deep rest during the night. I know that they don’t work for everyone, but for me the Indigo Gallery on HeadSpace at least helps me to relax deeply and usually at least sleep for a little bit.

  • I have joined Therapy in a Nutshell monthly membership, and I am working on ways to bring myself back to the present moment when I feel overwhelmed.

  • I’ve been doing a hypnosis in Joseph Clough’s “Hypnosis” app called “go easy on yourself.”

  • I scheduled time with my somatics coach, Stasia Savasuk. She helped me to start to be able to express myself and to hear my voice, to express my boundaries, and to see the gratitude for what’s actually working. I am hoping that by eating less processed foods, I will have money for more coaching with Stasia, and I know that that usually helps me considerably.

And then as I’ve been processing all of this, something interesting happened:

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The Parenting Secret: Why “Gossiping” Can Transform Your Child’s Behavior

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The Parenting Secret: Why “Gossiping” Can Transform Your Child’s Behavior

I was reminded this week of a strategy that I haven’t used much, but I am going to focus on this week with Charlie. It’s a strategy that can be used to celebrate your child’s accomplishments, or to point out the impact of their inappropriate behavior. I like to say that where we put our focus is what we get more of. So one of the best strategies to reduce a behavior is to be really aware of what behavior we want instead and then be sure to acknowledge all the little tiny baby steps along the way to that behavior.

The strategy I’m focusing on this week is called “gossiping” (from Dr. Harvey Karp in his books Happiest Toddler on the Block and The Happiest Baby Guide to Sleep. You can watch a video about it here.)

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Celebrating Joy and Connection: A Heartwarming Father-Son Moment to Make You Smile

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My words this year are celebration, self compassion, and guts. And this week in particular I’m working on savoring the celebrations. That has just brought to mind a lot of fun stuff. One of them is this video of a father and son watching TV together and talking about what they see. This video just makes me smile. It’s a celebration of fathers. It’s a celebration of parents. It’s amazing communication. And it just brings a smile to my face every time I watch it. I hope it does that for you, too. Go check it out for a good smile.

Related Content

For another opportunity to smile, check out my Valentine’s Day treat! Even when it isn’t Valentine’s Day, this makes my heart happy!

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My Name Isn’t Laura: What Mistakes Can Teach Us

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My Name Isn’t Laura: What Mistakes Can Teach Us

A couple of days ago, I created a “Welcome to Little Elf Family Services” video. I thought it turned out decently well, and I posted it. I watched part of the captions and changed the spelling of “mountain cur” but only realized after I had posted the automated captions that they misspelled my name.

My name is Lara. It isn’t Laura. It’s like the state in Venezuela, like Superman’s mother, like Lara Croft, or Lara in the movie Dr. Zhivago (which is where it really comes from, although I honestly don’t know the story all that well).

So that got me thinking about mistakes. Mistakes are hard. They are challenging. And the way that we handle them matters.

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Celebration & acknowledging what worked

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Celebration & acknowledging what worked

I think it’s so important to take some time to celebrate. One of my many favorite quotes is that “Being acknowledged for her competence helped her become moreso (1).” And that is one of my personal goals with all of the families that I serve: to help them to acknowledge their competence. I love to have a final (or almost final) session that’s just 15-30 minutes long, where we just take the time to celebrate what’s working and what impact it is having.

For example, families might say,

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A special Valentine's Day treat!

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This morning when I woke up, I was struggling to figure out how to celebrate Valentine’s Day with my larger tribe. I have been thinking on this for months, but honestly perfectionism got the best of me. Yet the celebration and the self compassion that I was looking for was waiting for me at just the right time!

One of my mentors, Stasia Savasuk, sent this out this morning and it feels like the perfect way to share Valentine’s Day with all of my people. And if you are reading this right now and WANT to be one of my people, please include yourself!

Stasia says:

Instead of waiting around for someone to LOVE YOU ENOUGH today, I invite you to FEEL THE LOVE that's already alive inside of you.

And when I say "feel the love," I really mean FEEL THE LOVE. As in, WHERE do you feel the love inside your body? What does it FEEL LIKE? How does FEELING THE LOVE make you feel?

I'm not gonna leave you to your imagination here. I'm going to WALK YOU THROUGH exactly how to do this.

I know you're busy. But today of ALL THE DAYS, you are worthy of the 6 minutes it's gonna take to watch this video, and fill yourself with love, from the inside out.

LOVE is a resource you have inside of you. Something you can draw up anytime you need it. 

I know you know how to do that. Because if you're anything like me (human!), you can draw up the most dramatic worst-case-scenerios in the world like it's your full time job––and FEEL THEM for days! 

Same mechanism. You're just drawing up a GOOD MEMORY, not a shitty one. 

Watch Stasia's video here

After you watch the video, if you’re willing, share what memory came to mind for you!

Then follow Stasia on Instagram or sign up for her email list on her website.

(Email shared with Stasia’s permission.)

Resources:

Baby Registry

Sacramento Resources

Nationwide Resources

©Lara Elfstrand, MA ECSE, IF-ATMHP - Little Elf Family Services, P.O. Box 5098, Auburn, CA 95604

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